By Heather Finch
No one can prepare you for all that motherhood will bring your way. We each have our own story to write about, our experiences, and so many unplanned chapters evolve as we go. Some chapters are filled with laughter, expectation, and surprises. Others are filled with tears, lost dreams, and abrupt endings that happen way too soon.
As we pass by Nation Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day, I take a moment to remember my own loss through miscarriage. In this experience, I learned about the fragility of life, a mother’s early attachment to her unborn child, and the dark depths of grief. Long. Deep. Sadness. I was a mess.
I learned about the fragility of life, a mother’s early attachment to her unborn child, and the dark depths of grief.
And I still am a mess when I allow myself the time to remember. It is a time in my life that I want to never re-live, and I grieve for those who also have lost their child, no matter how young or how old.
But what I write in my book today (in a much later chapter) is that somehow, God has made a way for beauty to emerge from my mess which allows a connection with other moms that I had never felt before. A beautiful result doesn’t make the loss any less messy, but the fact that God can bring about beauty from the messy parts of our lives is something that only He can do.
At first I wasn’t sure I wanted to admit this…as if it would erase the reality of my experience. But now I can whisper I am grateful. Oh, so very grateful.
A beautiful result doesn’t make the loss any less messy, but the fact that God can bring about beauty from the messy parts of our lives is something that only He can do.
So this year, I still “Remember Our Babies” and take the time to grieve this messy time of my life. I also breathe and take a moment to recognize the beauty in my mess and thank God for His goodness.
